Transform Your Marriage by Dating Your Wife
These days, the average married couple faces long hours at work and even more responsibility at home, so it’s no surprise that many couples have a hard time finding time to spend together. Fortunately, some of the best ways to spend quality time with your wife involve making more efficient use of the time you already spend together and engaging in short but meaningful activities.
Why should you date your wife? In the early days of any relationship, sparks fly and romance abounds. This is less to do with the newness of the relationship and more to do with the amount of time and effort both parties expend on getting to know each other. When you’ve been married for a long time, it’s important to rekindle that spark by investing in each other as you did when you were dating, and that includes spending time together. Over time, you will discover that no matter how long you have been married, there are always new things to learn about your spouse.
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Schedule a Specific Date Night
Research shows that 25 percent of couples who never make time to go on dates with each other end up in divorce court, compared to only 15 percent of those who spend time together at least once per week. Finding the time to go on a date can certainly be more of a challenge for productive professional couples with children and other responsibilities, but the benefits are worth making the extra effort. The good news is that date night doesn’t have to be costly. Creative couples can set up a picnic and enjoy a movie together after the children have gone to bed, or turn a day of errands into an exciting date day by going together and punctuating the chores with fun breaks for coffee or a lunch date in between.
Men tend to think that women only want them to listen more, but listening effectively is more often the issue. The next time your wife asks to tell you about something or to share the events of her daily routine, set aside any other distractions to listen intently. Even if you have to ask for a moment to wrap up whatever you happen to be doing at the moment, she will likely appreciate the fact that you want to be able to devote your full attention to what she has to say. Five minutes of quality listening time is more meaningful than a full hour of partial attention. Effective listeners don’t just sit in silence while the other person is talking. The occasional nod or comment, when appropriate, goes a long way toward showing her that you understand what she is saying and aren’t simply taking the information in passively. You don’t need to spend a lot of time listening to make your wife feel heard and validated.
Engage in Her Hobbies
If your wife has a hobby, participating in it with her can be a great way to increase your togetherness without taking any additional time out of your busy schedules. If she enjoys reading, try suggesting that you both read the same book and discuss your thoughts over morning coffee or before bed. Even those small moments are important when it comes to making her feel valued. If neither of you has a hobby, consider taking up a new interest together. There are plenty of sports that allow couples to bond, from doubles tennis to hiking and rollerblading. Taking up a new activity is a great way to enjoy the outdoors, get healthy, and enjoy some quality time together all at once. Even if your wife is interested in a hobby you can’t or don’t want to participate in, taking the time to learn about it and asking her about her efforts is a meaningful gesture that shows you care.
Putting these innovative ideas for spending time with your wife to work will not only help rekindle the spark you felt at the beginning of your relationship, but also deepen the bond you share. No matter how long you’ve been together, there is always room to grow with your spouse.